November 1, 2022

The Soundtrack of My Life – 37 – Viva Las Vegas

My dad was quite the Elvis fan. He loved him. One time we took a trip to Memphis so that my pop could go see Graceland. I had no point of reference at the time. I had heard his songs here and there but being only twelve at the time he wasn’t on my radar. During this trip I was more concerned with getting my hands on some beanie babies.

It was so odd to me that my dad only wanted to see his house. He could not have cared less about his cars or outfits. One would think, him being a super fan, he would have been chomping at the bit… but no.

Years later I would revisit Graceland with my mother-in-law who is also a big Elvis fan. She wanted to see everything. (Well, except for the cars. She could not have cared less about those.) Her main goal was to see his jewelry. Unfortunately all they had was maybe one belt buckle and a couple rings. “There has to be more!” she said.

Later that evening, after our tour of his humble abode, we watched the movie “Viva Las Vegas” in the Elvis movie theatre. And boy-howdy was that movie garbage. I have only seen two of his movies, Blue Hawaii and Viva Las Vegas and they are both giant pieces of misogynistic bull shit that feel almost like a cocaine-fueled dream than a movie. Out of the two, each had one song in each that I enjoyed. If you wanted a story or any kind of character growth… I’d look elsewhere.

The main reason I chose this song is because this previous Friday, the day this was supposed to be published, I was in Las Vegas with my boys for the Magic 30 convention. This was the final stop, before home, on our cross-country road trip. And this was the event I had been waiting anxiously for since started a month ago.

Magic the Gathering (if you don’t know) is a collectible/tradable card game that came out in 1993 (if you’re doing the math it shouldn’t be called Magic 30 but… whatevs). It’s a strategy card game where people purchase booster packs to get better cards to incorporate into the decks they use against their opponents. The idea is that you are a wizard with a “library” of spells and creatures to defeat an opposing wizard. There is more complexity to it than what I am describing, but if I were to delve into them this would be a much longer post. I for one like to produce “fun sized” posts to entertain the masses.

This was the first convention I had/have ever attended. I have wanted to do San Diego Comic-Con in the past but I am not quick on the purchase button for me to get a ticket. Plus I’ve never actually had the money to go to one before. This time I had the funds to buy all of my boys a ticket and entry into a few tournaments. Even competitive play is something I have never done, nor have I wanted to. Most of the attendees to such events loath a soap, water, and deodorant combo. There was none of that at this event, so maybe it’s just a local thing. Or maybe if they can afford a ticket to the event they also usually purchase the necessary self-care items.

When I first signed up I had also wanted to do a ton of events, but out of the corner of my eye I caught a disclaimer that events tend to run long. So from the 6 I had initially purchased I scaled it by half. And thank the universe I did. One of my events was over 5 hours long. I didn’t even get a chance to finish it, because I was in super bad mood and the dudes at my table said there was only 2 rounds, when the app CLEARLY said 3. But instead of trusting the people, y’know, facilitating the event I took listened to the word of a bunch of know-it-alls who deemed the “winning deck” of our “pod” was just some kid with a bunch of creatures instead of me, whom they all decided (collectively) to take out first because I was the biggest threat. So… fuck them. (I’m not bitter.)

Despite my failures in that single tournament (it was them and my own stupid inability to slow down and pay attention) I had an amazing time. I fully intend on attending another one in the future, should they hold one. And supposedly this is a yearly thing. Who knew?

After spending an insane amount of money on Magic cards… (see the photograph below) I am officially home. It’s weird to be back, but I couldn’t have lived like that for much longer. Hopping from one hotel to the next is exhausting, especially when you have a co-traveler who requires many different life-saving devices in tow.

I’m just glad we got to tick off some bucket-list items for my husband (Boston, Florida, and New Orleans.)

Our only regrets is not spending more time in Austin and in Boston. My husband opined, as we were leaving “Bean Town,” that he wished we had set aside an entire month for the city instead of just a week. He is a foody traveler. He wants to taste all of the best local places to eat. I’m a sightseeing/experience guy myself.

It started out with just this… which is still TOO MUCH…

and then morphed into….

One of the boxes of cards and 3 of those decks merged into that white card box. Those are 3 shirts in the pile at the bottom. And not pictured here is this SWEET jacket I got.

October 25, 2022

Tell Me More About Me

Ever since Orlando we have been on the road home. We had intended to have a longer stop there, so I could go to the Magic Kingdom, but we cut it short so we could meet my in-laws in New Orleans. Unfortunately their flight was cancelled and they never made it. (Bummer.) We would have had a lot of fun. I love my in-laws.

So with an extra day in New Orleans we were left with a lot of time to fill. All of which was spent in the French quarter.

While parts of it are derelict and ugly, it still maintained this beauty that I cannot quite explain. Aside from the smell on Bourbon Street. It was pungently sour and I could not place it.

“That’s vomit,” my brother-husband informed me with a confidence I could not argue with.

And seeing as how we were on Bourbon Street, that tracked.

All of our trips are pretty much dictated by food. As I’ve gotten older I’ve deviated from the husband to be more of a sites and experience guy. I think because I pack on weight like I’m heading into the harshest winter in existence and food will be scarce.

My husband was adamant on trying gumbo, jambalaya and even a po’boy. But once the two boys learned it was seafood they were out. They don’t eat anything that comes from the ocean. I’m okay with it when it’s battered and deep fried.

Lacking any real direction we wandered the quarter and then did a walking ghost tour with this adorable guide who made me smile every time she did her “fuuuuuuuuun fact!” She lunged foreword on one foot and did excited jazz hands, jangling her jumble of steel bracelets.

The other thing we did was visit the shop if the famous voodoo queen, Marie Laveau. It was quite the tourist stop. There were all sorts of magical things, rocks, potions, candles, alligator feet. As we were waiting for the brother-husband to find a voodoo doll to get his step mom, my husband turns to me and says “let’s get a psychic reading!”

This is not anything my husband has ever wanted to do. However being in the shop his enthusiasm was understood.

So, since I didn’t get the psychic reading I had wanted to do in Salem, I thought here would be even better.

“Yeah? Let’s do it.”

The gentleman was meek, small framed with blonde hair. He had on a tight black shirt that went to his mid thigh with woven fabric on the sleeves. He was definitely playing the part of a mystic. It was fun. He took us through a door with a combo handle to a tiny little wood cubicle. In it was a small table and two chairs. My husband could barely fit into it with his power chair but we made it work.

He took my hand and started.

“So, the diabetes skipped your generation.” It was both a question and a statement.

“Yeah,” I said. I was shocked because if that was a guess it was a good one.

“And you had a lot of ear infections as a kid, those are all better?”

“Yeah.”

He proceeded to tell me everything about me. Later, when I asked my husband about the reading he said, “he had you pegged perfectly.”

And he did. I just didn’t know if it was my own interpretation of the moment or real. Getting his confirmation made me feel better.

He proceeded to tell me many different random facts that had no correlation. It was almost as if he was skimming the page of my life and retelling me in this sort of stream of consciousness.

I would never leave California. I’d travel a lot but never leave. I’d have a son; and a daughter. Both adopted. And that I would start school again in the spring.

That one was weird cause I’m like… I don’t see that happening. However… since then it has become very clear that if I want to move into a better role at work I have to go back to school. My husband said the psychic, Phillip, said I’d be going back to study math.

I don’t remember the specifics of how it came up but I told him I was married and he looked genuinely perplexed.

“Do you have someone on the side?” He says point blank.

I bark a laugh, give this wry smile, and say “yeah. You could say that.”

I proceed to tell him the dynamics of my and my husbands relationship.

For whatever reason he did not pick up that I was referring to Charlie.

“You will never get divorced.” He said matter-of-factly. “And your boyfriend isn’t going anywhere.”

(My husband said that Phillip stated that “he wouldn’t go anywhere until I got bored with him” and I genuinely don’t remember that.)

He stops my reading there and reaches out and lays a hand on my husbands knee. He proceeds to tell him that he’s not leaving the chair. (“Duh,” I thought. By the way, we did not give him details of my husbands diagnosis.) He said that there were many doctors appointments for my husband in the future. And that he was going to start an experimental treatment that was going to improve it. Which… is a stretch.

The number one thing that stood out to me about his reading was that he told my husband he wasn’t going to die any time soon.

Some highlights that tickled me, were when he said that my mother would never remarry and was content in her small space. He was right but not in the context he was telling me this information.

When I told my in-laws about this they were convinced he looked up my social media. And he may have, but the fact that it took him a concerning amount of time to comprehend that charlie was my husband was odd. I made multiple references to him as my husband. He eventually picked it up but… it was strange. The other thing is the details he told me, his good guesses, is not info I have EVER or would EVER share here. I mean, I have now in the context of this retelling, but at no point have I shared the medical facts he told me.

We were both thoroughly pleased with it. Absolutely worth the price. If you ever find yourself in the French Quarter, get a psychic reading from Phillip.

I would like to add that I am someone who does believe this stuff. There are things in this world no one can explain. And rather than attribute it to some higher being I give the credit to the immense power of the universe. Some may also call that god, but I do not. And I don’t think psychics can tell the future. I think they’re more interpreters of energy. I think Philip just read what he felt from our interaction.

October 23, 2022

The Soundtrack of My Life – 36 – Two by Two

So in the tradition of “a song with the name of the location we are leaving,” I tried to find a song about Orlando that had some sort of memory or meaning to me. But there is honestly nothing that includes it. And the new ones I came across were depressing as fuck. So, I settled on this song.

This is from one of my favorite musicals. If you are unfamiliar it was written by the creators of South Park and one of the writers of Avenue Q and Frozen. So. Have fun with that knowledge.

This is the only musical I have ever listened to the soundtrack first before ever having seen the show or read the script. Usually I need context or mental imagery to enjoy a musical soundtrack but this interested me more than any other. I was not disappointed.

If you haven’t had a chance to see it, please do. I’ve seen it twice with two different casts and absolutely loved it each time. I had to stop myself from not acting out the role of Kevin Price.

In regards to any memory attached to this song, all this makes me think of is a workday where I was tasked with taking photographs of houses in a neighboring rural town. Instead of doing it solo I asked an old friend if she wanted to come along with me and the two of us sat and giggled like idiots to the songs. With both of us having come from deeply religious backgrounds we audibly gasped at the blasphemous lyrics.

This is one of the only good memories with that friend. She was problematic and someone I genuinely wish I could just forget existed. Especially her insane, Christian family. There are times I’m overwhelmed with anxiety just obsessing over the thought of them. Which is insane because they are nowhere near my current reality. They just made me so angry and I want nothing more than to tell them to their stupid fucking faces.

I have previously written about her mother trying to tell me to find a nice girl and settle down after a (one of many) break up with my husband. Evidently I made a face that was rude and she was insulted. Not that what she said was fucking insulting or that I always have a horrible expression… but whatever.

We left Orlando and booked it to New Orleans. We are on the final leg of the trip. After this weekend it’s hopping from one stop to the next until we make our way to Las Vegas and Magic 30.

October 14, 2022

The Soundtrack of My Life – 35 – Boston

And here we are again, with a locational song to bookend our trip to the city of the same name. Boston has been a wonderful city. Absolutely gorgeous. Even the dump parts of it were enchanting. I would live here in a heartbeat. Well… almost. I can’t handle the lack of street lights on the highway or the the lack of lane markers or, worst yet, the fact that off-ramps just happen with no real warning. Other than those, gorgeous town.

The whole point of our road trip was to make it here, which is why I set aside a week. The hubby and I have never been and have always wanted to. He had thoroughly enjoyed it. He just wishes we had designated the whole month here instead of 5 days. And he’s not wrong.

During our time here we’ve also gone to P-town and Salem. I thought Provincetown was going to be a short day but it turned out to be fun filled. And I already can’t wait to go back.

Today we set off for Philadelphia where the Bf will be flying in to meet us for the weekend. Can’t wait to have all my boys together again.

Now to the song…

The first time I had ever heard this was on the pandora station I would play at my desk, while in the employ of my previous employer. It was the only perk of working there, getting to have my music. Other than that… it was the worst experience of my life.

It’s funny, because while I was there I didn’t see how much it was killing me. I had just come to accept it. Never once did I question my mental health and self worth. Both of which my coworkers attempted to destroy.

I applied for this job and got into it by accident. I just wanted an office job. I was burnt out on retail. I couldn’t handle working holidays anymore. So I answered an ad and it turned out to be for an office assistant for a real estate appraiser. When I told my husband he was so jealous. He had always wanted to get into that line of work.

They initially liked me and hired me right away.

The man who trained me became a really good friend. I enjoyed his company. He was training to be an appraiser and I was meant to be his replacement. He went out on odd jobs here and there and worked overtime for the boss. The way the main appraiser and his assistant spoke to him was atrocious. They genuinely talked to him as if he had three brain cells. And he was very intelligent. (He’s currently a history teacher, which definitely suits him moreso than appraisals.)

I remember one time asking him, after this one woman had said something utterly despicable to him, “why do you put up with the way they speak to you?” He just shrugged a shoulder and turned back to his computer screen.

Years later, I was him. They ended up treating me the same exact way. It wasn’t until I left to work with my current employer did I realize how much of my sense of self that job drained from me. Away from it I lost a ton of weight and have loads more confidence in my ability to do anything.

It’s incredible.

All this song makes me think about is that cubicle, those horrible people… and how a change of scenery put me on the path to be who I was meant to become. If I had stayed there… I wouldn’t be in Boston right now. I wouldn’t have had the funds or the time to invest in my husbands final days.

I also like how in the song she went from California to Boston. Like me. And the cities are truly different sides of the same coin. And while I am a Californian through and through the call to this historic place is very real.